Chicago Recap

My visit home was *gasp* normal

Although I did not get to see my old childhood friend- I am a little upset about that-but duty calls while in Chicago.

Going home (now) is like a celebrity sighting- everyone is eager to see me.

It makes me feel good but at the same time annoyed- I felt like I spent most of my time running from one house to another and not spending as much time with the people that I wanted and tooo much time with the people I don't want to spend time with.

It felt so good looking out the window and seeing the Sears Tower (don't really give a damn about the new name- it'll always remain as the Sears Tower to me)

I realized that I haven't been home since Thanksgiving- a far cry from when I used to run home to Chicago damn near every month when I first moved to the DMV area.

Naturally hubby was late picking me up at the airport- no surprises there.

I also had to curse someone out in the airport- again no surprises.

I have no clue why men think it's ok to try to holler when you're on the phone with someone. How rude!

Upon seeing my nieces and nephews I realized that I am getting OLD *weep sob*

My nephew is almost as tall as I am (he's 9) and my neices are probably a couple of years from towering over me (3 and 4 years old). My nephew also looks so much like my brother it's eerie. He's my brother identical twin.

It felt so good to see those little faces although I don't see how my mother does it-those kids wore me the hell out.

That weekend was also "family portrait" time- my husband's family has a tradition of taking yearly formal pictures.

Everyone was there except for his sister-no surprises there. The heifer didn't come to our wedding so I expected her to flake on the family pictures.

It's safe to say I don't like my sister in law.

Naturally I also stuffed myself- entirely too much- but I couldn't help it.

Food and I have a passionate relationship.

Especially my Chicago favorites- funny I didn't eat much of it when I lived in Chicago- but move away? Boy I have dreams about White Castles, pizza puffs, and Harold's Chicken.

And I have to drizzle everything in mild sauce lol

So after the pictures, I spent time at my Aunt's house since I have a tradition of not attending hubby's fraternity picnic. I have zero tolerance for phoniness and lowkey perverted looks.

Since it's my mother's side of the family- had to keep my purse near me and zipped tight (no shade but um yeah they have roaches. Call it what you want but I don't see how people can live with bugs in their homes. An ant or two I can tolerate-maybe. But a whole damn roach community?! Nah son, can't do it. A centipede in the bathroom had me screaming so loud my neighbor came downstairs to see if I was ok. It took weeks (and a big ass bottle of bug spray and a visit from the apartment's exterminator) for me to go to the bathroom without checking under the mats.)

I am not a fan of bugs (or pigeons) and they were just...everywhere.

So you know I had to say something. I mean for real for real roaches having a block party and shit- I mean go in the kitchen a roach is frying chicken and shit.

It was NOT going to be a road trip courtesy of Tenacious- can't even go.

But since I said something, I mean again, how do you have people (not family) come over and you have bugs just every where- and the bold ones too that comes out with the lights on at that-I mean they were like "shit I live here too", it turned into a family argument and the tired argument that I'm "bougie"

Again, I may have grown up in the project but we did NOT have roaches!

I've been called bougie by my family for so long I don't even pay them anything attention.

Not to mention, I'm "bougie" on some dumb shit- like that day- I wore makeup for the pictures (nothing heavy, shit it was hot as fuck in Chicago, but my usual mascara, eyeliner and some eye shadow) and I was called bougie because I felt like I had to dress up to come over.

Bish please. Like I was going to waste a good outfit to shit talk and eat some food.

Or so the female roaches could side eye the shit out of me.

Then my lying ass cousin, yeah the same cousin I haven't spoken more than a sentence or two in some years, tried to drag my name into some sordid affair that occurred over 10 years ago.

One that I actually had no clue what she was talking about- but of course the intentions was to shit on my "oh so innocent" reputation.

Bish please. It's called dicretion. Use it.

I couldn't run out that door soon enough when hubby rolled up. I had to fuss though because he had my nephew out kind of late.

I'm a firm believer in bed time for children. That's what the fuck is wrong with children today- they're allowed to stay up way too late exposing their little eyes and ears to adult conversation and situations.

Hell I remember when I had a strict 9:00pm bedtime- no exceptions.

But the shit really didn't hit the fan until when we were leaving Monday.

Sunday was a pretty tame day- more bbqs and visiting family and friends.

So my father and I are not talking yet again- or I should say I'm not talking to him

Back story: A couple of weeks ago my father was diagnosed with diabetes (or "The Suga").

No surprise as my father has TERRIBLE eating habits- meaning if it's not covered in grease, salt, sugar or hot sauce- he is not eating it.

In addition my grandfather had diabetes.

So it's safe to say diabetes probably runs in my family.

Let Drama King (aka my father) tell it- he has terminal cancer or something.

Needless to say I was sympathetic but not entirely sympathetic- in fact I was surprised he was not diagnosed earlier.

Again terrible eating habits+medical history of diabetes= good chance of getting diabetes.

Naturally he bitches to my mom (who tattles to someone's mom) that I was so unsympathetic.

To be far: he called while I was at the airport for my disasterous Atlanta trip- I wasn't trying to hear shit at the time.

So on Sunday, I called him and told him I was going to be at my grandmother's house. Given that she's my only grandmother I have left I make a point of alway seeing her.

Now I made no mention of coming to his house-I mean that's an extra trip, ya know?

Besides he always drops my grandmother off after church.

So I get over there- he's no where to be seen. So I visit my grandmother and go about my business.

He calls at the crack of dawn on Monday as I'm getting ready to go the airport talking about he thought I was going to come over his house

Um yeah- when did I say that?

So I turn off my phone- I don't have time for that b.s. right now.

By this time he has stalked my cell phone, left messages on the house phone, and called hubby's cell phone--going into full Academy Award winning performance.

By the end of Monday oh he's crying to my mom that I "hate" him and all this jazz. I mean laying it on thick.

Now "hate" is such a strong word- I don't hate people. To hate someone is to dedicate immensive time and emotion toward someone-someone is often indifferent to your hate.

Have I hated people before? Yes. Do I hate people now? No.

Granted I can hold a grudge like no other however I am working toward resolving that.

Point blank: I just don't like him. My father, to me, is the most ANNOYING person on the planet.

And I do not like being annoyed.

I get especially annoyed when people:

1. Sweat me.
2. Expect me to sweat them.
3. Try to change me to better suit them.
4. Think they know me and know absolutely nothing- in other words, "assume" me to death.
5. Try to tell me about me--like I don't know who I am.

Not only that- he's so arrogant in his beliefs that he refuses to see anything else.

Example: My favorite color is Blue. I think almost anyone who knows me is aware of that fact- I may wear other colors but blue is my basic favorite.

-My father is convinced my favorite color is red. No matter how many times I've vocally told him, sent emails, did a few smoke signals, and wrote it out for him that point blank my favorite color is blue- he has stubbornly held fast that my favorite color is red.

Just the few minor-but major-annoyances I've dealt with my entire life.

So now I just ignore him. I've told him in so many words that I am not interested in pursuing an adult relationship with him- I have no interest in being "Daddy's little girl" and our relationship would probably be much better if he just left me the hell alone--but he is conveinently deaf-and blind-to my resistance.

And not only that- stop whining to people. It's like, I'm a grown ass woman dawg, what the hell can my mama do? What can my husband do? Hell what can my grandmother do?

I'm grown as fuck. And I'm past the age where someone can tell me what to do and I have no choice but to comply.

So he's on black out mode for this latest stunt.

So I'll be the bad daughter.

*dons villan cape*