Mashed Potatoes, Gravy, and Cranberry Sauce...

WhoooooHoooooo

*LMAO* I couldn't resist!

I'm crushed the Bears lost.

Sure I was doing laundry, talking on the phone and watching a movie while the game was going on, but I felt the pain...when JBN came back from a Super Bowl party and told me they lost.

You already know I did not watch the game *lol*

I even missed half-time with Prince. I'll Youtube it this week. How could I miss Prince? One of my top 10 crushes of all time?! I should kick myself.

Damn Green Mile! Why do I love you so much?!

Of course when I went to work today a lot of friendly ribbing about my hometown team was inevitable. Although...why do people continue to talk "sport talk" with me like I know what they are talking about?

I am really borderline. After I retrieved my mail Friday, I'm in the elevator going back up to my apartment, face in my trashy tabloid magazine, so when the doors opened I got off. Why did I go to the wrong apartment? I didn't have my keys so I'm ringing the door bell and knocking on the door excessively *playing of course* so JBN could open the door. It's a little game we play where we crack the door open like "Yessss...May I help you?"

Lame I know *lol* That's how we have our fun *lol*

So after a minute, I see the peephole darken. Why did this guy crack open the door looking at me like I was crazy?

And why did I look at him like "Why the fuck are you in my apartment?"

So we're having a face-off when he asks basically what the hell do I want, ringing his doorbell like I've lost my mind. I open my mouth to reply when I see the apartment number.

I'm three floors below my apartment.

Boy was my face red. I didn't think I could turn that shade of red. I mumbled an apology and scurried down the hall. I'm probably "crazy crackhead broad" now.

You know I was looking popped.

That's that borderline for you.

No Honey I did not go to jail for stalking Justin. I realize I already have a criminal record in IL and I do not want to see the inside of a VA prison.

Federal government played me this tax season. A bitch owe $402 to the motherfucking FEDS! You know I am fucking pissed. BUT...get $55 back from Virginia. The hell?! Apparently I claimed something I shouldn't have and now I have to pay what I owe.

Makes me want to jack a fed. like Riley did Santa *lol*

I am too pretty for jail. Maybe not federal prison, I heard you live the life in there, but straight gutter prison? I'd hate to shank a bitch over a pudding cup.

BUT...Robin Thicke on the 14th? RT and Tank may need extra security *lol* Ima need JBN to have some bail money ready *lol* Yeah boo yah ya girl has tickets to the event since WKYS be playing and shit with the tickets. Why they couldn't just sell the fucking tickets is beyond my understanding. Esp. when they're being stingy with the giveaways, I don't want a fucking Sidekick 3! Damn a "KISS Card"! Up them tickets nigga! But JBN has surprised me yet again.

And that's why I love him.

I've worn RT's cd out in the car, I've obsessed about these tickets since I found out the only way you could win the tickets is through the radio. I have listened to the radio the last two weeks more than I have in years. And it's all paid off. February 14th I will be at LOVE *not in Detox though* looking and smelling good, screaming my head off for Robin Thicke AND Tank.

Thanks to my new position guess who was called in on her day off to work Saturday? That's what the fuck I get for picking up my phone like an idiot. It wasn't that bad though, spent more time as usual goofing off and playing on E's discussion board.

Damn board has me neglecting my blog *lol*

I'm glad I'm not still in school otherwise no work would get done. I swear when I'm bored at work, I'll log in and next thing you know it's time to go.

Although I am sure one of these days I am going to get kicked off the board for "starting shit". I swear some people need a tall glass of "Shut The Fuck Up" with a nice side of "Be Easy" cookies.

My first offical day in my new position wasn't bad *yet*. For one, I am busy. As lazy as I am at work, I hate lagging periods. I'm a busy body I need things to do otherwise I begin to get tired. I worked clear through lunch so I left early.

I see now I'm going to have to check a few people. Some folks really think because I'm new at the position that must mean I'm stupid. I'm not doing mine and your job while you chat on the phone with your boonopolis *see I said I would re-jack this term* and shit.

Yeah...Ima need you to end that phone call right quick and answer my questions about your fucked up resume. Work with me people. Work with me.

BUT the best part of my job:

"Um yeah....not part of my job description" and "I'm going to need you to step over and let her assist you". Line wrapped to the door? Not my problem anymore *lol*

AND since I come in when many of the guests have departed for the office, 1st LEVEL PARKING baby! Three steps to the door and I'm in there? Stop playing.

Today was colder than a summabitch. Even I, bred on "The Hawk" wind, was clutching my peacoat, cursing the fact that I left my scarf on the couch. Of course traffic was a fucking standstill. Why the FUCK are people slowing down and it's not snowing or raining? Damn why must a 10 minute trip up 110-S take 20-30 minutes?

I think as my driving improves, my road rage increases.

And to the BITCH that almost ran me off the road because not only does a bitch not check her blind spot but you really thought you were going to make that ramp too huh?--FUCK YOU!

I can fit into my favorite Tommy jeans. Those Ralphs? Yeah I'm a little ways from getting into there.

Funny. I want to be thick but not thick at the same time.

Well...I want "thick girls" breasts. *lol*

The "Itty Bitty Committee" is dwindling among my friends. I'm close to being the sole member. If TWIN actually ate, I think she'd pass me up.

Is it bad that I'm addicted to Victoria Secret's? I think I buy something from the website every week.

BUT my "You're Getting Some Tonight" drawer is filling up quite nicely.

Now if I could manage to work a pole without falling off...The "Future Stripper of America" drawer would see a MAJOR come-up.

Oh well. I still look sexy in my "do me" pumps and Leopard one piece.

It's cute when men flirt with me when I least suspect it. And you know me: Flirt Whore. I'll crack the award winning smile in a second.

Men who do "check up" calls are lame. Trust you are not in the running for Tenacious new "In House Dick" if JBN and I broke up. Not even 3rd runner up. Hell you lost in the "Talent" competition.

You know what I don't like? When I send an email or text and don't get a reply. People don't realize those damn texts cost. Nigga you're not with Verizon! Reply dammit!

People must not realize that it is a priviledge if I actually call someone back within two weeks. Hell if I send a text outside my network! Esp. if the person is someone I don't communicate with on a daily basis. Shit my limit for outside network texts are at it limit almost every month.

And stop with the dumb ass forwards! If I don't respond to the shit via email why send it through text? I hate those dumb ass chain letters!

What type of letter starts off all nice and sweet, puppy and kitten pictures all though it and shit, and end with "Send this to 10 people before midnight or you will die a horrible flesh eating bacteria death!"

The hell?! Morbid bastards.

How come people can't remember my name but always remember TWIN's? Newsflash: WE HAVE THE SAME FUCKING FIRST NAME!!

I'm always the "dark skinned one with the bad attitude" *lol*

My attitude is only bad when people get on my bad side. And it takes a LOT now to rile me up. Either I'm slightly annoyed or amused.

But you know I don't give a fuck anyways. "Don't Like Me? Get in Line!" is my new T-Shirt slogan for real.

Am I the only one who still does the "pee pee" dance? I always have to pee as soon as I park and why does the elevator always take forever? Then takes forever to get to your floor AND then you can't get the key in the door?

I have a weak bladder so I'm already half naked as I run down the hall, pants unzipped and everything. Trying to run while my legs are half crossed and shit.

*lol* wow that was random.

Finally bought "Boondocks" on DVD. Expect random quotes all up and through this blog. When does the new season start *if any*? I heard June. Can anyone confirm?

I need some "Boondocks" to go with my "Family Guy".

I can't believe it my 1 year blogging anniversary is coming up. Wow.