Tuesday, August 29, 2006

I Hate Being A Girl *Sometimes*....



Today I’m in a grumpy place.

I’m working at night *cringes*

Aunt Flo has decided to drop in on me a fucking week early. I’m not complaining considering the alternative but dammit I was not expecting you for another week. Just threw a damn monkey wrench into my plans.

Fucking Direct Loans. I loathe you. Oh your website might be fixed on the 1st? But I can still mail my payment in huh? Just my name, bank information and social security number just all out there on a check huh? Just make it a little bit easy for the identity thefters *lol that’s not even a word is it?* to snatch up and ruin the credit that I have worked too damn hard for.

Fucking attack cat has been on the rampage. Why the hell did the cat gnaw up one of my damn thongs? I found the shit under our vents along with my eye drops, a bite size Reese Cup, and one of my Hello Kitty key chains. Fucking thong was gnawed to shreds, if I didn’t see the Victoria Secret’s tag in the back I would have sworn it was an old rag. So not only is the cat an attack cat but a pack rat and a damn thief. He is so lucky I watch Animal Police and I know they wouldn’t hesitate to put my ass on blast for beating the shit out the cat.

Did I mention I’m just generally grumpy around this time of the month? And it’s not like I suffer from cramps or anything because I don’t. I take a one Tylenol and I’m straight the entire 4 days. The Lord know what he was doing, he knows I’m a punk on pain. I act like I am stabbed from a paper cut, finger just gauzed up like it was chopped off or something. Which of course lets you know when I do drop a seed, I plan on being drugged to the max. Damn that, I’ll inject myself. Me and the baby glassy eyed and high like a muthafucker.

I hate when people hang up in my face. How rude. The old me would call back and spaz the fuck out. The new me is like fuck it, bitch you’ll call me before I call you. Don’t be mad because I’m not trying to hear you before 8 am.

Yeah yeah I’ll be a bad friend.

My best friend is talking about she wants some Jordans for her birthday. Um bitch I don’t buy my own Jordans what makes you think I’m going to search on the internet for yours? And stop biting off of me, damn. *lol* Yes I did finally find my Jordans thanks to LIGHT BRIGHT he put me on to this website that sells AUTHENTIC Retro Jordans and some of those prices are out there, I wish I would pay $425 for some fucking shoes, and folks sure do buy them, shit buy mine then. So my shoes are being shipped to me as we speak. Gosh that man of mine spoils me. I have whined about them enough.

I said I’ll think about it.
I’m still grumpy though.

I hate being woken up early for nothing.

But you know good old DRAMA. Always has a story to tail. Um just because you have an 8 am class does not mean I have an 8 am class. I know we haven’t talked in a few weeks but um could you have called me after 10 am?

And everyone knows about the engagement. I wasn’t aware I had to give personal phone calls to everyone to announce the news. And besides I texted your dumb ass. And it’s on Face Book, bitch check the profile and not the pictures!

Speaking of which, I need to update my pictures. I have loads of pictures on the computer, I’m just being a lazy ass bum. I’m a camera whore so I’m always taking pictures so it shouldn’t be any reason on why I have this old ass picture from three years ago up. *lol*

And I also noticed I send an obnoxious amount of pictures to people from my phone. Obnoxious. I’ll just be taking pictures walking down the street and sending it to people. Nostrils just all up in the pictures and shit. I know people think I’m narcissistic. I’m preening for the camera, smiling and shit, just walking down the street. I know they’re thinking, “This Conceited Bitch…That’s why she almost tripped nah!” I do not need a camera phone obviously. I’m going to use it for a greater good…showcasing the hot ass messes in the Washington DC Metro Area. It’s still hot as hell here so the bears are still out and lurking. I still wish I had gotten my ideal breasts on camera.

So I’m going to stop sending folks pictures. I was looking in LIGHT BRIGHT’s phone *one of few guys who just let me snoop all up in their phone and shit, well we ain’t fucking so I guess he figures he doesn’t have anything to hide* and I have sent him at least, randomly, about 20-30 pictures. He has pictures that I’ve forgotten that I’ve taken and they were cute so you know I had to send them back to my phone *lol* Um yeah discovered his, um, porn collection as well. I guess that’s what hot out in the streets I guess but um yeah females should only highlight the good features and not the bad. I mean I know I have a few stretch marks on the butt but got damn…one girl had the entire beltway on her ass….I was like “photoshop” boo.

I’ve been guilty of the same crime so I guess I can’t rag on the girls too much although, um why would you send out a picture of your, um, vaginal muscle? In fact why would you want your phone that close to, um, that area? I might send the random “look at my cute panties baby maybe you should come home and rip them off” picture but I’m not to reach that scale. An occasionally booby picture here and there which usually is followed by “what the hell is that?” which of course is followed by the “middle finger” picture.

And even then I’m shy, I demand that it’s erased from the phone.

Or at least if you’re going to use the pictures for bad, heighten up the breasts, ok? Photo shop my shit or something.

I’m starting to feel much better.

We’ll see what this work day brings me.

7 comments:

thee modern isis said...

lol you know what.. it's funny but I can take a picture and hate the way it looks so I'll take that same photo over again atleast 10 times.

I have booku pics of me though in my phone and I'll occasionally send it to a certain dude who will remain nameless. Buterrum yeah.. he sends me those "special" pics. Whew.

I can't do it though.. I can't send the "special" pics.. I did however take a picture of me in some spongebob boyshorts for my ex. lol I uploaded the pic to my Yahoo email and for some reason, they added the pic into my photo album under my screen name. Well.. we'll just say I was getting chat stalked because dudes were finding that pic.

Man o man. Hope you feel better chica.

Rashan Jamal said...

only the priveliged get the right to call me in the morning. Others will get the grumpy T. leave me alone conversation.

I have yet to take a picture with my camera phone on purpose, but i got plenty of inside of my pocket pictures on there. And I got the perfect picture for your profile pic. You know which one I'm talking about. LOL

@ FH - how's that for flirting? LOL

By the way Tenacious, I'm gonna need for you to tell these other posters *ahem, isis and trish* who the man is. I'm supposed to be the first commenter. Remember? LOL

Angel said...

is this the same cat that ate up something else of yours?

aint nothing wrong with feeling good about being cute girl! sing to their asses: "im conceited. i got a reason!" just like remy's thugged-out barbie-bangs ass be doing! :-)

Xave said...

Sorry to hear that Aunt Flo is messing your plans. Of course you could just ignore her. Or not.
Now about the butt floss, here’s my guess: Victoria’s Secret is that your cat is a Tom and your thong is the closest he’s getting to pussy. Or not. :-)
Here’s some good advice. Before you send naked pics of yourself from your phone, send them to me first. I will give you my honest opinion and even do a nip n tuck (in Photoshop) if necessary. No need to thank me, that’s just the kind of guy I am. Just ask Anjewel. She hasn’t sent me any pics of herself naked but she’ll tell you I’m cool. :-D
Oh, and the morning thing. Only Ali is allowed to call that early, in fact she can call ANY time she wants, she always puts a smile on my face and a rise in my... Never mind.

Thanks for the chuckle. LOL

eclectik said...

...K, when AREN'T you grumpy!?

You have such a spell on men, you should leave them be; you ruin lives! lol

Which Jordans are they?

I wish a woman would send some 'special' pictures to my phone...would make the day go by extra smooth


lmao, I didn't know women still called it "Aunt flo" 4th grader puahahahahahahahaha!

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thee modern isis said...

lmao@ T Cas.

You need to step your "first commenter" game up!

Anonymous said...

So you send LIGHT BRIGHT pictures of yourself...