About To Start My Vacation...

Sorry guys

I, for once in my short life, have absolutely nothing to talk about.

For Labor Day…I did laundry. Wow I know. So exciting.

Tuesday I worked. Nothing exciting happened. It was a slow night. Nothing major.

I had an early morning doctor’s appointment to have my blood drawn for tests. It was raining, I got lost, and I get to the place looking like a drowned rat because oh my umbrella decided to give out on me. And why the fuck do they need that much blood? Don’t they just use a few drops? Bitch filled up two test tubes of my blood, I was like “Damn do yall know something I don’t? And can I get my extra blood back and shit? I might need that one day.” I had to sit there for an extra five minutes because she couldn’t find a vein in my arm talking about I must have poor blood circulation. I’m like, “Yeah I’m sorry I don’t shoot up anymore, you know I had to give that type of life up and shit”. I think she stuck me extra hard on purpose and shit. And I’m a hypochondriac. I get a headache and swear it’s a tumor. Every sneeze and cough I’m at the doctor sure it’s Ebola *hey I work with a lot of Africans, shit you never know*. There are a couple of funny stories about my experiences with the doctor but I’ll leave those for another day. Now I’m paranoid thinking I’m a ham sandwich away from a heart attack due to poor blood circulation. So I demanded more tests than the standard ones. Shit let me know something.

Yeah I was a little grumpy Tuesday because I couldn’t eat anything until after the tests were done so I did a T. Cas and only had one meal on Monday. No BBQ sad to say.

Today was a little bit of the same. Nothing extremely exciting happened. It’s Audit Time so everyone was on their best behavior, including me. No snapping at the guest, no hanging up on folks, nothing. I was sweet and polite.

I know. Folks were feeling my forehead all weekend.

Apparently I owe the state of Virginia money. Personal Property Tax. I hate Virginia. It sucks. And just when I thought I got away from the crappy state of Illinois, King of Bootleg, Random shit. I’m still heated that I had to pay for a nonexistent fence when I had my car accident last July. My fucking car flips over and I have to pay for the fence that I allegedly hit, which is untrue because that chicken wire piece of shit fence was intact when I climbed out of the car. State was too cheap to pay for it out of their pocket so I had to pay for it out of mine. And coincidentally I lost my fucking copy of the report so the insurance company went by the one the State send it *a completely different one than I had I might add* so I have to cough up $283. Illinois sucks and now Virginia sucks. Damn car is not even fucking mine! Now I have to pay $195 to Virginia. Oh suckie ass state!

I broke down and bought my best friend the stupid Jordans. Why did I buy the shit last week and it’s still not here? I’m an impatient person but damn it should not have taken this long. Now if the shit’s not in by tomorrow, my fiancé is going to have to bring them when he comes in town the following week.

I haven’t packed yet. I suck. I’ll do it tomorrow. I always wait until the last minute to pack.

I have my camera phone and cameras handy so this time expect pictures when I come back.

Mr. Mack we have a date…err well not a date per se….but umm we have….ummm a face to face?.....*lol* whatever you want to call it. I’ll email you with my info. That way you can tell folks how small my booty really is in person and how I probably got us kicked out of a random club because I cursed at the bouncer or something *lol* Or better yet, “Damn yall Tenacious really do talk too much!”

I’m jealous. Trish and Isis are some flawless females. Well they were flawless before the pictures but ladies I KNOW the men are going to blow up your page now *lol*

**sigh**

Yeah another reason for someone to try to push me out a closet I was never in. But hell I’ll give props when props are due, even the fiancé had to pause and was like, “Damn who’s that?”….hmm a little side eye and banishment to the couch straightened that one up right then and there *lol*

All the ladies on my blog roll are some flawless females talking about yall single…Yall some lying ass muthafuckers! *lol* Dudes must either be blind or gay. And even the gays ones might give you a second glance, nine times out of ten to appraise the outfit but that’s not the point.

Speaking of which, how come men never send ME any naked pictures? Hmmpt, I’m insulted. Everyone has a “naked person in my in box” story but me. Shit I get “Do You Have Problems Getting An Erection?” emails but no naked men. That’s some funny shit because I never get the “Increase Your Bust” ones, mine always have to do with penile erections or some shit like that. I won’t even get on the porn offers with the misspellings in it. Those are comedy in itself. So….um….yeah I’m soliciting *lol* Don’t send me anything that’s too freaky though. I don’t need that picture of you rubbed down in peanut butter. Just save that one for someone else’s email.

Well….maybe mine…but it’s gotta be the creamy kind.

*LOL*

Ok it’s official…I am a natural born fool.
If I get my lazy ass up early enough I might drag my ass to the library and blog.

I don’t really download porn by the way. Don’t even look at it. I just can’t look at a 14 inch penis and get happy. A bitch gets scared as hell. Ain’t no way in hell is that sliding up in me. My coochie lips ain't gonna be hanging down to the ground singing “Swing Low Sweet Chariot”, whistling and shit when I walk. Can’t do it.

Don’t have too much fun on me while I’m gone. I will be checking out my favorites at least on my phone!!