Pure Randomness...

Since blogger have been acting like a natural ass all week, I couldn’t post everything that I wanted.

*shakes fist*

So I’m back to try again.

Bad thing is I don’t even remember what the hell I wrote about! Don’t you hate that? I’m always saying I’m going to write some sh*t down but I have yet to scratch some sh*t out on paper. So I’m lazy. Sue me.

Wednesday I went and kicked it with CUTIE for a hot second. Haven’t heard his name in a while huh? Yeah he’s still lurking in the background, kinda leery of me still. I guess he’s trying to still feel out my character. I’m like, “Get in line my nigga. Get in line.” I was just chilling on his block for a little bit getting eye f*cked by all of his friends. I guess they’ve never seen a Chi-Town female before. I was told I had a “sexy gutter mouth”. Yeah that doesn’t sound as sexy in words *lol* The things that pass for a compliment nowadays…

I come home and get on IM and my guy was online. This is the same guy who I mentioned before who up and decided to tell me his “true” feelings about me and sh*t. Since his revelation, we haven’t really talked because I’m blown. I mean me and dude has been cool for the longest, sleeping in the same bed (no sexual pervs), shooting the breeze together and he just decide to tell me he’s been feeling me for years and how come we never hooked up. I mean he just knocked the sh*t out me with that statement because I never saw it coming and I pride myself on distinguishing between men who will try anything to f*ck (including pretending to be your friend all while fantasizing about your ass and some baby oil) and guys who ain’t on that. I’m not saying he was trying to be my friend just so he can f*ck but I did not know some of his feelings for me were in the non-platonic way. I’m not the type to think every man walking wants a bite of Tenacious. Maybe just a nibble but not a damn bite. And maybe not every dude but the ones who get trapped in my blinding smile. But I digress. I am not conceited. *lol*

So we’re making small talk because I’m trying to multi-task. I’m eating, typing on the computer, talking on the phone with FH, and watching tv *lol* I guess he wants to bring up the subject again but I’m trying to change the subject to no success. We start talking about old times and of course he had to post some incriminating pictures to go along with it. Pictures that I had no idea that he had. So naturally I want to know where the hell he got some of the pictures because I know some of them must have came through mutual friends that we know.

Turns out this guy has been swiping picture of me from friends for years. As in more than one. As in he’s a photo thief. Now I don’t know if he meant to confess he was swiping pictures or he hope I would not put two and two together. He has pictures of me that goes as far back as high school when I did not know him all that well. Not to mention he has a few creepy pictures. Like he posted a few pictures of me that are not poses. As in pictures where I am not aware that I am being photographed. He got pictures of me walking to class, sleeping in class *lol*, reading, studying, and even working out in the fitness room at the gym.

*shudders*

Yeah, he’s stalking me on some The Crush type sh*t. Like I told T.Cas, obviously this nigga took Obsession 101 and passed that b*tch with flying colors. Hell he’s working on his Ph.D. This fool even has a baby picture of me that he stole from my dorm room. Like the self-obsessed prick I can be, my dorm room was plastered with pictures of yours truly so it probably wasn’t too hard for him to lift a picture of me. Sure a few of my friends have swiped a picture or two of me and I don’t mind but it’s the fact that he took glee in that stupid picture.

So he calls me and we chat and I’m just like, “Dude, now you’re scaring me.” JDUBB is flashing through my head right now. But he’s like, he really like me and he wanted to say something before it was too late. Ummm yeah he’s like four years too late. But since I was in a good mood, I did not feel like cursing him. I just made him feel lower than low with my smart remarks and my insight on his “stalker” tendencies.

I don’t know guys I just feel restless. I think it’s the weather. Warm weather makes me feel sluggish. And lazy as hell. Even my thought process is crazy. I can’t think of a thing to write about. And this is me we’re talking about. Someone who will post about their favorite cheese or something.

I was supposed to go out tonight but I don’t feel like going out so I flaked out and canceled. My girls were mad but I told them I just don’t feel like being in the club tonight. I don’t feel like getting felt up by random guys tonight. Which is really irritating by the way. Please stop trying to grab my hand or rub on my booty as I walk past you. Once again you might be reaching for my purse and then I gotta chin check your ass. Growing up in a rough neighborhood in Chicago will make you paranoid like that.

Today I put in my transfer to go to another property. I just can’t take it there anymore. The managers are all about kissing Tenacious’ ass right about now but I’m just like, “Sign this so I can bounce.” And one of the cool managers that I actually still like had the nerve to ask me was it someone at work who is causing me to “run away”? I had to give him that “F*ck you mean” look? I would never let anyone run me from a job! *thumps chest* I’m muthaf*cking King Kong in that b*tch. I told him I wanted to leave before my sexual harassment lawsuits caught up with me.

Then, ok, typical Tenacious moment. So I’m walking down the street looking too fierce in my stiletto sandals and capris. Yeah I retired the flip flops for a few days and actually decided to wear the shoes I’ve spent so much money on only to never wear them and when I do, I wish (because Black people don’t hope) a muthaf*cker would step on my stiletto. I’m like how a nigga is in the club with his fresh Air Ones or some Timbs. Step on BCBG heels if you want to. I wish you would scuff these COACH wedges that had me broke for two weeks. And besides its open toe season and my toes will not have bruises on them from where folks have chomped down on my toes in the club. Feet looking like I’ve been building houses and sh*t with them. Tenacious can’t go out like that!

*lol*

Back to the story. So I’m wobbling in my stilettos because apparently I forgot about those four long ass blocks to the crib from the Metro and while I want to yank them bad boys off and walk barefoot, I was playing the “classy” role that day which meant hobbling to the crib while attempting to look cute. Now there’s this cute dude who works at Ted’s (a steakhouse) a block away from my apartment and while I don’t see his sexy little dreadlock ass everyday, I peek in the window every time I walk by to see if he’s in. So I guess he was taking a break or something because he was just lounging against the side of the building looking like a tall, sexy glass of chocolate milk. So instantly my goofy ass goes into “cheese” mode. Where you can see all 32 of my teeth and then some. More gum that Wrigley showing *snicker* Ok that was lame but you get the point.

So I try to straighten up my Wicked Witch of the West hobble and get the sexy girl strut on. So I’m so busy looking at him, I tripped over this lady and her cart. Me, the b*tch and the f*cking cart went down. Ok well I didn’t cause technically I broke my fall on the lady but can you say face, ass, back, hell arm muscles just red. After the lady must have called me every thing (I know she slipped a “nigger” up in there) but a Child of God in her native tongue, I helped her pick up her destroyed groceries from the ground. Meanwhile every body and they mama just the gawking. Including his ass. So not only did I show him I am a clumpy ass, I know he was thinking he got me all shook and sh*t. Cocky ass. More f*cked up because it was partly true. I was more mad at the b*tch that got in my damn way. I mean damn did you not see me drooling at the nigga to my right? I think the b*tch ran into me on purpose. Hating ass wrench. LOL at me trying to blame the lady.

So after I picked my lip up off the ground I tried to slide past him real slick and sh*t. I done took the shoes off, like f*ck it, no sense in fronting now, so I’m walking down the street with my shoes in my hand, still mad because now he’s going to see me as “Clumsy B*tch Who Runs Into Sh*t” from now on when I hear his sexy ass calling. Tenacious as I am, I refuse to turn around and turn the corner.

Do you know he chased me down to ask for my number? While he was chuckling at my spectacular flop on the curb, he told me loved a woman with a sense of humor. Sure I was embarrassed but you know my goofy ass was cracking up to the un-amused expression of the lady who ran her ass into me with that big dumb ass cart. We chatted for a few more minutes and needless to say, I don’t remember a word because a sister was too busy drooling. That nigga could have told me he rubs himself down in peanut butter and run naked in the streets and I would have been like, “Mmmm hmmm, Jiffy or Peter Pan?” So I gave out my number. I’m sorry he was a little too sexy to walk away from. I sure didn’t want it be like when I tripped up the escalator watching a chocolate morsel walk down the opposite way. Ok well it kinda was but hey he got the number this time.

I swear God is giving me signs to behave my damn self but damn that monkey called “flirtation” is constantly on my back. I need to have an intervention or something. In Chicago it was so much easier to avoid but I can’t control my wandering eye in DC. Sure for the most part it’s all innocent fun but I am like a step away from being a predator. Going to be abducting men from the Metro stop like Ay, I got them sports tickets.

*lol*

I am too silly for words.

But for real gentlemen…I do have season tickets. They right up in my car…