Two things: I am feeling much better today. I am still a little under the weather but I feel way better than yesterday, I also have a dentist appointment Thursday afternoon. Pray for me yall. I am terrified of dentists (along with my fear of insects, flying, and heights). Along with the fear that they will accidentally yank out the wrong tooth or drill a hole in my tongue because they're always talking to you while your mouth is propped open and like an idiot I always reply to their questions while they're just drilling away (Why the hell do they do that anyway?) and since I'm numb from the Novacain I won't notice until the blood start spurting over the blue bib and then I'd die from shock or something. *sigh* Overactive imagination at work sure but the dentist creeps me out too. I think I've seen one too many horror movie with the focus on a dentist or something. Besides I might have to "go under" for this procedure and something about being knocked out in a male dentist's office give me the chills. Wake up damn thighs a little sticky and sh*t. Popping out a little bi-racial baby in 9 months, swearing up and down I don't know how the baby got blue eyes and sh*t. I don't even like having a male doctor. It's something about a male doctor being all up in your vagina asking you about the weather that have me skating for the door. Plus I'm paranoid after seeing "The Hand That Rocks The Cradle" and the freaky doctor who was getting his rocks off with ol' girl. I better see a glove on that damn finger and don't be wiggling around up in there either. Knowing damn well that ain't the cervix! And lawd don't let me see the dentist's own grill is messed up...I'm walking straight out. There are some professions that I just expect perfection and the dentist is just one of them. You can't fix my grill when your own teeth looks like shark's teeth. Mouth looking like you got bust in the mouth with a bag of quarters. Un Uh. No way. That's gross.
Second thing: My stalker did not appear this weekend. He called but he did not stop by my job. I think he went back home *drops to knees and pray he went home* Whew...Tenacious was on the verge of joining Witness Protection. Like, I said I think I attract crazies or something. He called but I was at work so I didn't pick up. His text (after the 5th time of not getting an answer) simply said: I miss you. *shudder* If he act like that from a dance, imagine if he actually got the booty *shudder again* I would probably still be tied to the bed, gnawing off my arm or something because you know he would have tied my ass up so I couldn't make my escape. Be screaming and sh*t while he's caressing my face, smiling eerily while tracing his initials on my stomach with my blood or something. *lol* Overactive imagination at work people. There are crazy Black People out there. I was in denial for a long time, like "Only White People Do That Sh*t" but after the DC Sniper and a few random serial/family killings committed by Black Folks..I don't know yall. Like my grandma says, "The End Of Days Is Coming". Especially after the DC Sniper thing. I was still in Illinois at the time and I was convinced they asses were White. For months, I was denial. I was like, "Naw he just got a tan...His mama must be White...He got that Jewish afro...He ain't really Jamaican" anything but Black. They should be N*gga-Slapped. But after encounters with a few stalkers, I am sure that Black People are starting to lose the left side of their mind. I hope dude finds his so he can leave me the hell alone.
Why, Oh, Why, was I blessed with this body?
One of these days, I'm going to stop hiding behind the computer and actually post up a picture. I have too many saved to this computer but I'm too lazy to pick one. Besides, people I know might be reading this blog and try to put me on blast in the comment section *lol* Wait who am I kidding? They asses stay on Facebook and My Space. But you never know...I have hella pictures on FB and some of the strangest sh*t get linked on Google Images. I'm probably on there now.
Like when me and my girls dressed up like Destiny's Child for Halloween Sophomore year. Our inspiration? The Ghetto yellow outfits they had on in Bootylicious. Blond weave, gold toothfus and all. *lol* I'm sure that pic is circulating around on the internet. Probably on hotghettomess.com We went to some party and boy were we a hit. Of course it was like 6 of us so we were like DC with all the girls who have been a part of DC. I was Kelly yall but I had the Beyonce weave, gold toothfus, and dookie chains. We even put on a performance because we loved that video hence the inspiration. We had the little dance down and everything. Ok we were a little offbeat and we had to kick one friend to the curb (DC style) because she was laughing too hard. We were a hit. Never mind it was like 40 degrees out in central Illinois at the end of October and we were scantily clad hoochie mamas...Time of our life! And we got hella candy. Got sick off of sad candy and spent the day piled 6 to a twin size bed all moaning and groaning. Yeah...You would be surprised on how many people we could fit on a dorm's twin size mattress and everyone ends up comfortable. That, my friend, is a skill in itself. Hell my house was "chill" central and I always had at least 6 people sleeping in my king size bed (I'm a bed hog so I need a big bed). In college, sh*t I would sleep at my Kappa brother's apartment and it would be at least 8 of us in the bed (no sex yall Get out the gutter). He had the best sheets and comforter in the world. He had $300 Egyptian wool type of sheets/comforter and oh lawd we fought to sleep in his bed. Of course his little random broads weren't pleased but he wasn't even thinking of us in that way *to our insult* Sure we felt the morning poke but sh*t wasn't popping off. Besides he treated my girls and I like little sisters. He would get us noggies, fart and belch in front of us hell on us, scratch his crotch, eat up all our damn food, wrestle with us and beat a n*gga ass if they looked too long in our direction. At first he didn't like my boyfriend but when they became Kappa brothers, they got cool and he would begin to send me home after 11 pm so I can be with my boyfriend. Me and him couldn't sleep in the bed together though...You guessed it...BED HOGS!
*sigh* I miss his crazy self. He lives in the ATL now. Doing big things in the medical field.
*sigh* Today, a year ago, I lost two close friends to a tragic car accident. I've been in a funk all day. Just sad and a little emotional. Crying and sh*t. I miss them so much but I know they're in a better place. But it's weird you know. I still expect a phone call from them or a little smart remark or something. They were also like my big brothers. Full of life and just so damn optimistic. Always in a good mood and quick to offer a kind word or a funny story. *pours out some 'Yak* I miss you Mike and Ramadan.
Work was actually amusing. We're having a war between two of the managers. A new cute girl start working there and I'm trying to hook up one of the managers with her but the other is such a booty hound and got her in her scope so we're playing (unknown to her) Tug Of War with who gets to get her. I'm on "Team R" and my friend is on "Team D". So far, I got the upperhand. "R" and her went to lunch together due to my prying and the fact that "D" didn't come in until 2 pm. So root for "Team R"!
I have a job interview tomorrow. Wish me luck! It's for an Admissions Coordinator for the Art Institute of Washington, DC.
3 comments:
girl I am with you, I can't be having no dentist with no broke teeth. when I was in college there was this one dental student that used to try to get people to come get cleanings because they were only $10 for students, and I could never do it because his teeth were just nasty! you ain't touchin' my teeth!
I hope you get better, baby...I also pray that the stalker will leave you alone VERY soon!
you had me rolling with this one:
"Wake up damn thighs a little sticky and sh*t. Popping out a little bi-racial baby in 9 months, swearing up and down I don't know how the baby got blue eyes and sh*t"
LMAO @ your overactive imagination
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